then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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