At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
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