Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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