Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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