i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
