dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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