remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
