I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
