We won't sleep together?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize