I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
