Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize