Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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