I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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