keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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