It's Friday. Sex?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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