i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
