I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
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