Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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