She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
