if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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