You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
