with your own penis?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize