I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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