I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
