Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
