I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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