you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
