After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I love having hate sex.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
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