Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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