Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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