sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Can Purell be used as lube?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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