do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
