I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Randomize
