Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize