I think im going to throw up on grandma
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I'm passing your future prison.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
