I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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