I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
God, I missed his penis.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
