well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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