Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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