I wanna passion pit in your ass
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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