Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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