I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
