R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
