Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
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Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
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was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV