it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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