you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Randomize
