She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
