Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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