We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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