"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
